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淮安最佳的人流时间爱问活动

2019年10月17日 11:05:58|来源:国际在线|编辑:最新信息
Depending on your personal view, ancient Rome was responsible for giving the modern world a number of traditions, including various legal ideas, democracy, and some of our religious celebrations. However, there are still many ancient Roman traditions that are slightly obscure, mostly relegated to the dustbin of history. Here are some lesser known ones.从您个人的角度来看,古罗马负责给现代世界留下许多传统,其中包括各种法律观念,民主主义以及一些宗教庆典。然而,仍旧有许多古罗马的传统略显晦涩,这些大多都被扔进了历史的垃圾堆里。这里就有一些鲜为人知的。10、Mos Maiorum祖先之法The mos maiorum was an unwritten code pertaining to behavioral customs mostly derived from the traditions of the Romans’ ancestors. Much like the Jews in the first song in Fiddler on the Roof, the Romans loved tradition and felt that moral decay would occur if they strayed too far from the ideals of the past. Therefore, obedience to the mos maiorum was seen as tantamount to maintaining a proper civilized Rome and was almost given legal standing.祖先之法是一条关于行为习俗的不成文的法则,大体上源自于罗马人祖先的传统。就像犹太人在《屋顶上的小提琴手》中所唱的开篇序曲那样,罗马人热爱传统并且认为如果太过于偏离过去的思想,那将会导致道德的沦丧。因此,遵循祖先之法被视为无异于维持罗马文明的一种方式,甚至几乎拥有法律地位。There were occasions where breaking tradition was seen as subversive; in the case of legislation, it was considered customary to bring proposals before the Senate. Any magistrate who neglected to perform this duty ran the risk of being labeled a traitor. Even with the strict punishment handed down for certain offenses, it was still considered unwritten. As such, the transmission of the mos maiorum from one generation to the next was said to be the duty of the family, especially the paterfamilias (head of the household).有一些打破传统的场合被视作是颠覆性的;在法律上,被认作是参议院提案的惯例。任何忽略履行这项职责的法官,都冒着被当作是叛徒的风险。即便对于某些罪行有严厉的惩罚手段,但这仍旧被看作是不成文的规定。因此,祖先之法的代代相传被当做是家庭的责任,尤其是家长(即户主)的责任。 /201407/316147

What do ex-British prime minster Gordon Brown, Jackie Onassis, Britney Spears and I all have in common? We all are (or were) nail biters.英国前首相戈登·布朗(Gordon Brown)、杰奎琳·肯尼迪(Jackie Onassis)、布兰妮·斯皮尔斯(Britney Spears)之间有什么共同点呢?他们都爱(或曾经都爱)咬指甲。It#39;s not a habit I#39;m proud of. It#39;s pretty disgusting for other people to watch, ruins the appearance of my hands, is probably unhygienic and sometimes hurts if I take it too far. I#39;ve tried to quit many times, but have never managed to keep it up.这嗜好我可不喜欢。被别人看到多恶心呀,把双手的形象全毁了,很可能不卫生,如果咬得太深还会受伤。我也几次试图想要戒掉,但从未持之以恒。Lately I#39;ve been wondering what makes someone an inveterate nail-biter like me. Are we weaker willed? More neurotic? Hungrier? Perhaps, somewhere in the annals of psychological research there could be an answer to my question, and maybe even hints about how to cure myself of this unsavoury habit.最近,我总在想是什么让像我这样爱咬指甲的人恶习难改呢?难道和其他人相比我们意志更薄弱?更神经质?更有欲望?也许心理学研究的文献能够给我,也许还能给我一些暗示,教我如何自我摆脱这个令人讨厌的习惯。My first dip into the literature shows up the medical name for excessive nail biting: #39;onychophagia#39;. Psychiatrists classify it as an impulse control problem, alongside things like obsessive compulsive disorder. But this is for extreme cases, where psychiatric help is beneficial, as with other excessive grooming habits like skin picking or hair pulling. I#39;m not at that stage, falling instead among the majority of nail biters who carry on the habit without serious side effects. Up to 45% of teenagers bite their nails, for example; teenagers may be a handful but you wouldn#39;t argue that nearly half of them need medical intervention. I want to understand the #39;subclinical#39; side of the phenomenon – nail biting that isn#39;t a major problem, but still enough of an issue for me to want to be rid of it.第一次浏览文献就发现了过度咬指甲的医学术语:“咬甲癖”(onychophagia)。心理学家把它归于一种冲脉控制问题,即类似强迫症问题。但这仅指极端案例,精神病学对此的帮助颇有成效,对其他过度怪癖也是如此,如:皮肤搔抓症,拔毛癖。我可没到那种程度,只是和大多数爱咬指甲的人一样,一直有这样的癖好,但没什么严重的不良反应。45%以上的青少年爱咬指甲,比如:青少年可能只占一小部分,但你不会说他们中一半人需要接受医学治疗。我想要了解这种现象临床症状不明显的一面——咬指甲没什么大惊小怪,但它对我来说依然是件大事,得去克。It’s mother’s fault都是妈妈的错Psychotherapists have had some theories about nail biting, of course. Sigmund Freud blamed it on arrested psycho-sexual development, at the oral stage (of course). Typical to Freudian theories, oral fixation is linked to myriad causes, such as under-feeding or over-feeding, breast-feeding too long, or problematic relationship with your mother. It also has a grab-bag of resulting symptoms: nail biting, of course, but also a sarcastic personality, smoking, alcoholism and love of oral sex. Other therapists have suggested nail-biting may be due to inward hostility – it is a form of self-mutilation after all – or nervous anxiety.当然,心理学家在咬指甲方面有许多理论。西格蒙德#8226;弗洛伊德(Sigmund Freud)把它归结于性心理发育不良,当然是在口腔期。典型的弗洛伊德理论认为,口欲滞留的原因有很多,诸如:喂食不足或喂食过盛、哺乳时间过长、或与母亲关系不睦。当然,各原因交错也导致了诸多症状的发生:当然,咬指甲是其一,还有为人尖酸刻薄、吸烟、酗酒、喜欢口交。其他理疗师建议将咬指甲归于“内在敌意”——毕竟是某种形式上的自残——或是紧张焦虑。Like most psychodynamic theories these explanations could be true, but there#39;s no particular reason to believe they should be true. Most importantly for me, they don#39;t have any strong suggestions on how to cure myself of the habit. I#39;ve kind of missed the boat as far as extent of breast-feeding goes, and I bite my nails even when I#39;m at my most relaxed, so there doesn#39;t seem to be an easy fix there either. Needless to say, there#39;s no evidence that treatments based on these theories have any special success.像大多心理动力论这样解释也许是说的通的,但没有特别的理由说我们去相信这些解释是对的。对我来说最重要的是:他们并没有任何强有力的说法,如何自己戒掉这个习惯。就母乳喂养的程度而言,我早已过了那时期。甚至在我最放松的情况下我也咬指甲,所以似乎也没有什么简单的解决办法。更不用说,现今没有据明基于这些理论上的治疗有任何特别的成效。Unfortunately, after these speculations, the trail goes cold. A search of a scientific literature reveals only a handful of studies on treatment of nail-biting. One reports that any treatment which made people more aware of the habit seemed to help, but beyond that there is little evidence to report on the habit. Indeed, several of the few articles on nail-biting open by commenting on the surprising lack of literature on the topic.可惜在种种猜测之后,也慢慢无从所知了。检索相关科学文献只发现一些基于如何治疗咬指甲癖的研究。其中一项研究指出:任何让人们愈发认识到咬指甲这个癖好的治疗似乎是有所帮助的,但除此之外并没有什么有关该癖好的报道。事实上,几篇为数不多关于咬指甲的文章公开评述该问题上的文献严重不足。Creature of habit习惯的奴隶Given this lack of prior scientific treatment, I feel free to speculate for myself. So, here is my theory on why people bite their nails, and how to treat it.鉴于之前没有接受过科学治疗,我可以轻松地自我省视。所以以下就是我自己的理论,解释为什么人们会咬指甲,以及如何治疗这个毛病。Let#39;s call it the ‘anti-theory’ theory. I propose that there is no special cause of nail biting – not breastfeeding, chronic anxiety or a lack of motherly love. The advantage of this move is that we don#39;t need to find a particular connection between me, Gordon, Jackie and Britney. Rather, I suggest, nail biting is just the result of a number of factors which – due to random variation – combine in some people to create a bad habit.让我们把这个理论称为“反理论”之理论。我假设没有特殊的原因引发咬指甲——不是因为什么母乳喂养、长期焦虑、缺乏母爱。把这些统统都排除的好处是我们不需要在我和戈登、杰奎琳、布兰妮之间找出一个特别的连接点。我认为:咬指甲仅仅是由于诸多因素引发的——由于随机变异——一些人形成坏习惯的结合。First off, there is the fact that putting your fingers in your mouth is an easy thing to do. It is one of the basic functions for feeding and grooming, and so it is controlled by some pretty fundamental brain circuitry, meaning it can quickly develop into an automatic reaction. Added to this, there is a ‘tidying up’ element to nail biting – keeping them short – which means in the short term at least it can be pleasurable, even if the bigger picture is that you end up tearing your fingers to shreds. This reward element, combined with the ease with which the behaviour can be carried out, means that it is easy for a habit to develop; apart from touching yourself in the genitals it is hard to think of a more immediate way to give yourself a small moment of pleasure, and biting your nails has the advantage of being OK at school. Once established, the habit can become routine – there are many situations in everyone#39;s daily life where you have both your hands and your mouth available to use.首先,有这样一个事实:把你的手指放进嘴里是件很容易的事。这是喂养最基本的功能之一。所以它是受一些最基本脑神经元回路控制的,也就是说它能迅速发展成为一种自动条件反射。此外,对咬指甲有一种“打理”因素——让指甲始终是短的——这就意味着就短期而言至少它能让人心情舒畅,即使其主要是让你的手指苦不堪言。这种奖励因素同行为者采取的愉悦相结合,意味着这种癖好能够轻松养成;除了手淫之外,真的很难想象有什么更为直接的方式让自己愉悦片刻了,而且咬指甲的好处就是在学校这么做完全没问题。这种癖好一旦建立,就会变成常规——每个人的日常生活都有许多你都得使用你的双手和嘴的情况。Understanding nail-biting as a habit has a bleak message for a cure, unfortunately, since we know how hard bad habits can be to break. Most people, at least once per day, will lose concentration on not biting their nails.把咬指甲当作是一种癖好去理解,对治疗的作用并不大,因为遗憾的是我知道摆脱坏习惯有多难。大多数人一天中至少一次会无意识地咬指甲。Nail-biting, in my view, isn#39;t some revealing personality characteristic, nor a maladaptive echo of some useful evolutionary behaviour. It is the product of the shape of our bodies, how hand-to-mouth behaviour is built into (and rewarded in) our brains and the psychology of habit.在我看来,咬指甲并不是揭示了什么人格特征,也不是一些对人类有益进化行为的不良反映。它是我们身体构造的产物,是手对嘴行为如何在人类大脑中建立以及习惯心理的产物。And, yes, I did bite my nails while writing this column. Sometimes even a good theory doesn#39;t help.是的,我在写这篇专栏的时候确实咬指甲了。有时就算是一个好理论也帮不上忙。 /201407/313365

You may not realize it, but some things you do habitually can make you lose money. Let’s see what those costing habits are and how we can reverse them.也许你都没意识到,一些习惯性的事情也会不知不觉浪费钱呢。我们来看看一些浪费钱的小习惯,学习如何去改正吧。1. You are a chronic complainer你是个负能量的抱怨者If you always see the bad side, then you might not see the opportunities around you. When you miss opportunities, you inevitably lose money.如果总是看到坏的那一面,那么就会失去很多机会,一旦机会都失去了,钱肯定就赚不到啦。For example, if you are too busy complaining to yourself about how your co-worker sucks, you might not think that you would be a great fit for that new project that just came out. Yes, the one that would boost your resume and possibly lead to a promotion. Opportunity lost.比如你一直都抱怨同事们多么的没用,也许就想不到其实自己非常适合新项目。对,就是那个能展现你实力带来升职机会的新项目。可惜没咯。2. You think you would never spend this much money, and then spend it你觉得自己绝不会花那么多钱,然后花了。My friend and NYT best-selling author Ramit Sethi likes making fun of people who think they will never spend, e.g. , 000 on a wedding. But when time comes, and it’s their turn to get married, they spend it.我朋友和《纽约时报》畅销作家Ramit Sethi喜欢取笑那些总觉得自己不会花那么多钱的人,比如花3万美元筹办婚礼。但轮到他们结婚的时候,似乎花的也不少哦。I’m not criticizing spending money on your wedding here. I’m just saying that had you accounted for the “having a big wedding” scenario, you might have saved more in the past, and hence not need to get into credit card debt.我不是说不该在婚礼上花钱。我只是说如果你已经考虑了一幅“有个盛大婚礼”的场景,你就应该开始节约用钱,这样以后才不至于成卡奴。3. You don’t negotiate你不还价From negotiating the price of your car, to negotiating your salary, you have a lot of potential to save thousands of dollars. Yet beware, negotiating is not something most people are skilled at. I recommend buying books and then spending 1000x more time actually practicing the books’ teachings with a friend.无论是买车还是谈论薪资,你都有可能去省一大笔钱。要记住,讨价还价并不是大部分人都擅长的事情。我建议买本类似的书,然后和自己的朋友把书里的技巧默默练习几千次吧。That’s how you’ll walk into a negotiation with confidence and y to tackle anything that comes your way.这样你就能自信的开始讨价还价,让一切都尽在你的掌控。4. You think short-term vs. long-term短期/长期计划We often don’t really take into account the effect of our actions in the long run. For example, you not negotiating a k increase in salary does not just cost you k this year, but maybe next year as well.我们往往不会考虑自己的行为在长远时期的影响。比如,你不会要求涨五千美元的薪水,也没有意识到今年不要求,明年也会没有。In your next job interview, the employer will try to pay you according to your past salary. Your negotiating position will start from k less than what it could have.你的下一个面试,老板也会试着按照旧工资来付薪水。你至少可以要求涨薪五千美金,这样才不会比本可拿到手的低。5. You think “I can’t do it” instead of “How can I do it?”你总觉得“我做不到”而非“我如何去做”?You can make more money at your current job. You can negotiate more, or improve your skills and then ask for a raise. Or, you could make more money on the side. Or, you can start your own business.你可以在现有的工作上赚取更多的钱。你可以沟通协商更多,提高你的技能然后要求涨薪。或者是可以干点副业,再或者自主创业吧。The options are infinite. The more you’re stuck on “can’t”, the more you’ll be losing money that you could have earned had you not had this bad “can’t” habit.选择是不定的。你被“不能”捆绑得越多,养成了“不能” 的习惯,那么就会失去越多本可赚到的金钱。6. You avoid saying “no”学不会说“不”Your sister asks you for money. She never gives the money back, but you still just can’t say “no.”你问你借钱,从来不还,你还是不会说“不”。You keep lending money, or buying dinner for your friends, just because saying “no” is easier than paying. I’m not saying that “no” should come easy. But I am proposing to be conscious about why you do what you do.你总是借钱或者请朋友吃饭,只是因为说不比付钱要简单。我不是说拒绝可以简单,我只是建议你需要意识到自己为什么要做这件事。7. You confuse your account balance with your self-worth你混淆了存款和自我价值The balance on your account is just a number. Yet, we tend to be emotional with that number. When this balance is not up to our standards, we may feel shame and self-pity.你的钱只是个数字,的确我们对那个数字有感情。一旦达不到一个标准就会觉得丢人和难受。That’s exactly what overweight–or even thin–people feel when on the scale. The number on the scale feels like it describes their self-worth, when it doesn’t!这就是那些称体重的胖子或瘦子们的想法。称上面的数字似乎显示了他们的价值,但实际并没有啊。The result of this confusion is that you might be afraid to even open up those new bills. Or, you might avoid dealing with your debt because it’s just way too scary to do so. But the good news is that it’s just a number–it doesn’t have anything to do with who you are.这样的混淆只会带来一个麻烦,就是你会害怕去花钱。或者只是因为你害怕而再也不想去处理欠款问题了。但其实,这个数字——真的跟你是什么人没有任何关系。8. You buy stuff without understanding why你总买些莫名其妙的东西In Money: A Love Story author Kate Northrup urges us to understand what made us make each purchase. First, we look at our credit card statement. Were our purchases good ones, or are there any purchases that we would have been better off without?In Money:《金钱:一个爱情故事》的作者 Kate Northrup 要求我们对每一笔花销都心知肚明。首先我们要看看信用卡额度。我们是不是在买好东西,还是这些东西可有可无?Once we complete this step, we move on to step two. How did we feel when we made each purchase? If you actually do this step, you might find out that the purchases you made while feeling bad, needy, or lacking, are not the ones you are proud of.一旦完成了这一步,就来到了第二步,买每一样东西的时候是什么感觉?如果你真的做到了这一步,也许会发现买这个让你有点难受、窘迫或者缺钱了,而不是让你骄傲。 /201311/265165

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